Credits to: https://unsplash.com/s/photos/girl-in-field
I sit in this little space in the office, hoping for a tinge of life in my gray-colored routine. It has been the same for the last two years, office work- domestic work- a wink of sleep--- and I wake up, cursing the world around me and I get ready for work again.
In days where I am most profoundly busy, I find beauty in the chaos my position gives me. It's the type of serenity that I find myself getting drawn into, thinking that if I can check one tick box at a time I did something right for the day.
And in days where I actually have five minutes to myself, I think maybe today I can finally read the book I always wanted to read, or watch that movie I've had on queue for the last three weeks, or finally fix the sheets I always wanted on my side of the bed. Then my toddler shouts for my name, and I hear my youngest scream for attention, and my daze is over. I don't and can't afford any of those single life luxuries now, do I?
Life. Motherhood. And just the full load of in betweens.
I love my kids. They are worth every tear, life-threatening pregnancy, and lost hours of sleep. But once in a while, a little part of me just wants that extra hour of sleep, that extra 5 minutes to bathe, and that impossible day all to myself.
So many wishes but no time to be weak... Hold on tighter, there's more to come.
