Earlier this year, I met a few close friends of mine who used to also be my colleagues when I was still starting out in my training profession. It was one of the most wonderful and productive conversations I've had in a while because getting surrounded by people who have the same passion for training as me was scarce in the corporate jungle I navigated back then.
While exchanging updates about work and our personal lives, one of the two asked me what my real goal was. I gave him a puzzled look. The question seemed trivial, but I honestly could not form the words to answer such a simple question.
He hit me with rhetorical questions, "At your age right now, I believe your main goal is still to move up the corporate ladder, yes? Titles are still important to you, isn't it?"
I responded with a brief, "Yes", and our conversation hit its end and we shifted to another topic.
As I got home, I started to wonder if my YES answer still held true. I contemplated the direction of my career and if titles were still that important to me. Was that really all there was to it?
Was moving one step higher and getting a coveted title attached to my name my overall goal? I pondered on this over and over that night.
And then it dawned on me. It wasn't.
My genuine goal is to give my family a comfortable life. I no longer want to live from paycheck to paycheck. I want to be financially capable of retiring early.
But I also want to give my family the best version of who I am. A life where I actually get to spend time with my kids and create core memories for them to treasure as they grow older. They need a mom who is actually present; someone who can play dance mode, play kitchen toys, and sing along to Taylor Swift songs like a choir with them to their hearts' content. So, spending 12-14 hours on the job, killing myself to chase a title I cannot take to my grave doesn't seem to align with anything.
Right there and then, I realized, what will my titles mean if they don't take care of what my true goals are?
That month of self-reflection gave me weeks of sleepless nights and a ton of caffeine intake.
But it was also that pivotal moment that was the catalyst for me to change my direction. No one else will do it for me. I should be the one taking charge.
And so, I did. After a long and painstakingly nerve-racking time, I finally took the leap.
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